


Ape Powers Hetalia

by Daegaer



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers, Planet of the Apes
Genre: Anthropomorphic Personifications, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-30
Updated: 2009-12-30
Packaged: 2017-10-05 12:14:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/41631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daegaer/pseuds/Daegaer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Italy has an odd visitor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ape Powers Hetalia

"I've never spoken to a monkey before," Italy said, wide-eyed. "Would you like me to make you some coffee? My friend Germany thinks I'm good at that." He smiled at the monkey happily as he set out the good cups and measured out his best coffee, the kind he liked to keep for visitors. "It's nice when your friends think you're good at something, isn't it? He thinks I'm good at cooking too."

"I'm not a monkey, I'm a _chimp_," the monkey said in a long-suffering tone. "And a coffee would be lovely, thank you." He took the cup, then ran a hand over the hair on his head, vainly trying to flatten it into some sense of order.

"Just a minute," Italy said, patting his hand, and scampered off to the bathroom. He came back quickly with a small tub in his hand. "Would you like to use some of Germany's Brylcreem? If you have to use it all over, that's OK. I'll buy him some more before he comes to visit me again. I'm sure he wouldn't mind a monkey using it."

"_Chimp_," the monkey said. "I'm a _chimp._ And I happen to be a respected scholar. Please address me as Dr Galen. _Really._ Calling a chimp a monkey is like calling a human a – a – " he searched for a sufficiently insulting word.

"A chim- never mind," Italy said quickly. The monkey – _Dr Galen_, he reminded himself – was looking rather like Italy had rudely spat in his coffee, which Italy would never do, not even in the middle of the war when America had turned up in his house so unexpectedly. Or not unexpectedly, after all, Romano had been talking about it for weeks and saying they both had to be very polite and say sorry a lot. Which wasn't the point, Italy thought, because Dr Galen was looking very sad and lost. "I suppose it would be like calling me an individual person," he said brightly, to try and get Dr Galen talking again. "Would you like some sugar? This one is very nice, I know it looks like little brown rocks but it's really sugar, and I have these lovely little biscotti –"

"You _are_ an individual person," Dr Galen said, sounding rather like Germany did when Italy told him about one of his really _good_ ideas.

Italy thought about it. Dr Galen was a scholar after all, and scholars were awfully clever people. His smile grew a little vaguer as he concentrated. No, he could still feel every one of his people, all the way down to Rome, then the slightly different feel of Romano's people, and quieter, like an echo, the ones who'd gone off to live in other people's houses.

"I'm pretty sure I'm not," he chirped and poured himself a coffee too. "Would you like me to make you some pasta later?"

"That would be lovely," Dr Galen sighed, surreptitiously stealing a banana.


End file.
